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Old Me/New Me
by Fred Pruitt

Do you remember the time when you had the epiphany/revelation (whatever you want to call it) where you knew the 'old' you was gone and dead and there was only Christ in you as you? And did you sort of have an 'identity' crisis.

I can't say I've had any particular "moment," that I remember, that is what you describe. I know I have moved to what you say, but nothing stands out as an epiphany moment to just that. Maybe the reason that's so is that believing that truth -- after having had the revelation of it -- has taken a long time. I think it's been more gradual in my consciousness to no longer identify my life with who I was formerly -- and by formerly I don't mean back in the old wild days, but the "old" me is far more subtle than a concept that we learn in Romans 6, but is a consciousness of self which we have from birth, which is the temptation we live with daily. The "old" me is the person who is of this world and affected by this world's whatever -- our personal history, talents, looks, intelligence, psychology, education, social status -- and finds identity and personal truth in all that. Whether positive or negative.

That's what walking around "according to the prince of the power of the air" means. We are caught in the temporal, and are minded only toward the temporal and believe everything about us is coming out of that temporal.

But it's like I told you when you were here. You are no longer your old psychology, and owe no debt to it. No one is a prisoner to his past, or to anything else -- once delivered, which we have been in Christ.

But see, that does take a while to sink in. Romans 6 says the old us is dead and buried, but it sure doesn't feel like that and it takes a while for us to settle into that because that is the nature of every temptation -- to bring up who we were and offer that as who we still are and always will be. God winks at our ignorance a long time in this, because everytime we condemn ourselves we make Him a liar, but that's ok, He can take it, because that's how you grow kids up anyway, and part of parenting is patience. And so he doesn't hold our ignorance against us as we continually battle over this point.

That's why it's so hard for people to say "as us." It sounds like blasphemy because we still identify with our outer selves in separation and to say that this "thing" which we consider at least partially dirty and maybe a bit depraved (ourselves) is "Christ" is outlandish! And it would be, if that were what we were saying. We are not saying the "old self" is Christ, but that's what people hear, because they still identify themselves with the old self. They think we're declaring freedom to the old self, but we are instead announcing the God-anointing of the new self into total liberty of self-for-others. In the cross the old self is gone, and anything contrary to that in our mind or even in our sight is a delusion sent to deceive. What comes now is a completely new self, He joined to us as one spirit so that we are Christ in us, and this starts a completely new life in the new birth. A life where Christ is formed in us, and we live Christ and only Christ by faith every moment.

Getting back to your original question about an epiphany moment and identity crisis, as I said above, this has taken me more gradually. What has turned the tide is not any sort of attempt to rid myself of wrong notions or thoughts or ideas, but to supplant everything with Christ as All and in all, Christ swallowing up and taking into Himself all that which was "me" and having risen to newness of life (innocent as a newborn babe) as a new me. More and more what I realize is that He cares for me as His very own self because I AM His very own self -- my true self that is, which is always hidden only in Christ in God, and which is entirely and completely a construction of the Lord out of the Eternal, and mirrors only Him in my own created uniqueness of person. Christ as us swallows up anything which came before.

It's all Him, though, the whole kit & kaboodle. All that "him showing through me more" stuff is hogwash, still giving credence to the old self. I know above I just said that this overtook me gradually -- the consciousness of it -- but the realilty of it is instantaneous. Christ is All in all from day one, and "shows through me" by His will, not by anything I conjure up or thwart. My stumblings around don't thwart the plan and will of God. They are HE!

So back to square one with your question, which is I really don't have a specific answer. Christ is All in all in us, and that is total and complete and entire. Redundant, but isn't everything?

Love,
fred