The Unlikely and Impossible
Finding God where it seems like God can't possibly be seems to be at least part of our task in this life. And that task, not by any means for ourselves (that's a side benefit), which is finding God in the unlikely and impossible, reconciles the whole world.
He came to be Emmanuel -- God with us -- and seeing the Invisible Father manifest in the Son in the midst of what looks like manure, is the struggle and ultimate temptation in life.
I admit it, there are times and days I'd rather be somewhere other than where I am right now, doing something other than what I'm doing, certainly with fervor wishing I was FEELING something other than what I am feeling, and maybe more honestly and deeply and extremely, I could wish I was another person than the one I seem to perceive myself to be right now in this present moment -- a person who doesn't have the life I'm living, who hasn't made the mistakes I've made, who could do this and could accomplish that -- THAT'S the (imaginary) person I'd like to be.
Those are the days & times when spiritual cliches and platitudes -- "God has everything in His hands" -- "everything works together for good" -- can't be functional, can't be true, can't apply to THIS bull-pile right now!
This is the temptation that is common in varying degrees I think to all of us.
Because the Truth we know inwardly by the Spirit's witness in us to the truth of, "I live yet not I but Christ," and "to live is Christ," says that we are TOTALLY (NOT PARTIALLY), HE LIVING IN US AS US, AT ALL TIMES, AND THAT EVERY MOMENT (RIGHT NOW) IS THE MOMENT OF THE LORD, AND THAT EVERYTHING, AS WE ARE EXPERIENCING BEING AND LIVING IN THE RIGHT NOW, IS GOD IN PERFECTION, AND HE HAS BROUGHT US (HE IS RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL AND WE FOR NOTHING) TO EXACTLY THIS PRESENT MOMENT, TO BE HIS PRESENTLY SPOKEN WORD, BY THE ETERNAL UNFOLDING OF HIS PERFECT WILL, EXPRESSING HIMSELF PERFECTLY BY MEANS OF US HIS SONS WHO HAVE BEEN BORN AGAIN IN CHRIST JESUS. PERFECT GOD EXPRESSING HIMSELF PERFECTLY THROUGH AND BY MEANS OF AND AS HIS PERFECTED ADOPTED SONS.
And this is the thing that boggles our minds because we know we are unworthy and stained and yet He has put a hot coal from His own altar on our tongue and caused His Spirit to enter into us and to stand us upright on our feet, beyond the power of our own strength for we were down on the ground not even having the strength to look up.
It's the mind-boggling, head-busting, too-good-to-be-true-but-IS-TRUE REALITY of ABSOLUTE LIBERATION, to hear and see God the Father above all, and through all, and in all, in the RIGHT NOW, in what looks like instance after instance of weakness or failure or saying the wrong thing or lack of wisdom or, my favorite for myself, flawed character -- GOD IS ALL OF THAT!
"No," some will say, "I can't put my weakness, my failure, my wrong unwise choices, my FLAWED CHARACTER, on God. He isn't responsible for THAT!"
But God says, "The former things have passed away" and He doesn't remember them anymore, nor do we. We don't think after the flesh. What was former, exists no more except in its real truth in God, and is all now redeemed in Him as everything is meant for Good, to save much people alive, and so whether good or ill has come our way in the past, whether we have committed heinous sins or been saints, none of it is of any merit (for good or evil) except that God has redeemed us by the blood of Jesus in an eternal sacrifice which has eternal ramifications, eternal effects, and that when it says, "The former things have passed away," then we have entered into a new realm where there is only One Tree, the Tree of Life, and the old tree is cut down at the root and put into the fire and burned up. And we feel the burn of it.
In the old tree we trembled and cursed ourselves and others in our vanity and fear and judgment, and heard the howls of the beasts that were after us.
In the Tree of Life we have only One Lord and One Who is All in all, the Sufficiency and Power and Wisdom and the Same One Person in us all, and the DOER OF ALL.
The Accuser has only one job. To deny you your sonship. He is sent by God to do this very thing. He doesn't work for himself, though he thinks he does.
But you have from the Eternal always had an advocate, and a Lamb slain for you, whose purpose in sending the deceiver, the lying spirit, is to bring forth the Lamb, the Eternal Truth, and not just in heaven, in the Uncreated, but in earth, in you and me.
This is an absolute impossibility for us to do -- to bring forth Christ.
And this is what is done only by grace, absolutely outside the realm of human thinking or power or sight or understanding, and by no means possible by human attainment. Since the whole idea of "attaining" unto God is predicated on the original lie that there is a separate self that needs to attain, since there is no such thing as a separate self, but only One Self, and He by grace Himself in all His created selves, even if in freedom some of those selves who like all selves live and move and have their being in God have turned their glory into shame, still all praise God and accomplish His will (even though self/devil-deceived into thinking/believing they're doing their "own will" which is cockamamie since Ephesians says in plain out words: "He worketh all things after the counsel of His own will). Only one will happening in the universe. That's what it says.
And that why there's a struggle every day, why some days hurt, because we see the inner, we see the truth, but the outer comes to us as opposite, as accusation, as contradiction, and some days the grace doesn't seem to be there and the last thing we want to hear is some cheery voice saying, "Every day with Jesus is sweeter than the day before," because lately and a lot of times it has seemed like "Every day with Jesus is a bigger drag than before," because we never feel strong and we never feel quite worthy and we never feel quite like we measure up and we honestly wish we were different or that the Lord would change us into some super spiritual person we know we ought to be and wish to be but He doesn't ever seem to do it and then somehow out of grace from far away, or deep out of silence a Remembrance occurs, and yes, we Remember, and we know that all accusation and contradiction and everything being a big drag was only to see the Lamb in all His glory, all that was only His death and that which lacks of His sufferings manifesting in our mortality, as we fill up that which is behind of the sufferings of Christ in our mortal flesh. It's His Life living in our flesh.
It's the daily cross. To be faced every day with the opposite of the truth, which is just simply that we our just ourselves and we need improvement and we have a whole lot of "oughts" and "shoulds" to get about doing in order to grow and mature and to one day (which never comes) reach perfection, rather than the absolute and total truth that THIS DAY IS the redemption of the Lord, whether by my life or by my death, in all that He does this day, it is He, and implicit in being Him, means to be All that He is, which is to be One with the Father and to ABSOLUTELY FORGET OURSELVES, and to have a baptism of participation in Christ's death for the redemption of the world, to be bruised and wounded, to be the offscouring, to be fools, to be sheep for the slaughter, to believe an absurdity, starting with believing a man who was the Son of God raising from the dead, and then to further believe an even more absurd absurdity, that the Spirit of the Father in that same Man Jesus is now in us who are redeemed in His blood, and that we are One as He and the Father are One, as He prayed for us in John 17.
Every day it looks like that ain't so. And every day we get to say it is so. Let there be light!
In all things.
Arise, shine, thy light is come.