Itís so good to hear from you.
Take your ease. I would say to you right off the bat; Quit struggling to get there! You have taken a Person and He has taken you.
The caterpillar operates in ease. The only difference in him and us is that he cannot reason what is happening to himself. That is why what appears to be a struggle really is not.
Free yourself. Nothing and I say NOTHING of this process as you call it is up to you. The entire onus of responsibility to enter into His rest must be upon His shoulders.
Have you read the story of the man who watched the Sucopia Moth as he was emerging from moth stage into a butterfly . . . .
At the end, because he could not bare the moths suffering, he took scissors and cut the last membrane to free him. The moth fell out an abortion and died a cripple. Because the very juices that were required to force life into his wings were destroyed.
Please put away all your self-help books telling you 'about' how the process is done. I know the writers mean well; but as long as your attention is drawn to 'one more thing I should or could do' . . . you will be prevented from taking your final leap into your savior. Only one man could save you. That was Jesus. Only one Man can bring you into union with himself and that is the same man who has come in His 3rd personhood to live again in and as His perfect Laura form.
Go to the mirror. Stand there and hear the same words Jesus heard in the Jordan.''Thou are my beloved son in whom I am WELL PLEASED". . . .
You are the Laura form of Christ. He HAS COME . . . there is nothing left to do except accept yourself . . . and to walk in the truth of who you are. He is training you now, not to look at how to do it . . . but to look at Him, for He is the author and finisher of your faith. If you have none, be satisfied with that.... if you have lots, be satisfied with that.
Rest. Rest . . . cease from your labors to make this happen . . .
It already has happened. And it is up to Him to cause you to KNOW . . . .
I'm sure missing you. I can't believe you won't be with us. . . . This is where you need to be, once a year to hear what you are longing for . . . .
All my love, Linda